Labor Day Weekend

My weekend thus far has been pretty pleasant and I have hopefully overcome my Labor Day stigma from my past. I had a Labor Day when I was younger, I honestly don't remember how young I was, that I got sick to my stomach. Now, we all have our fears...some of us are afraid of public speaking (I'm not), others are afraid of spiders (I am), but one of my GREATEST fears is getting sick to my stomach. This stemmed from the very FEW times it happened during my childhood, but yet for some reason my anxiety would get crazy intense afterward and I would OBSESS over it for literally years (no kidding). One time, I got sick after eating a steak and as a result I did not eat steak for about 2.5 years and steak is one of my favorite foods. It's pretty intense. So any way, ever since then, I've had anxiety around the Labor Day weekend. This year, maybe because I am not currently working, it was easier to forget it was Labor Day. Normally you get excited that you have a 3-4 day weekend but when you're not working, pretty much every day is the weekend so it really doesn't matter. I spent most of the weekend being extroverted which was a nice change since I am, by nature, an introvert. I guess the whole unemployment thing again leaves me with more energy than normal to talk to others. I am also participating in Fantasy Football for the first time this year with my own team. My 'strategy' was to pick the names that I liked and to pick names of guys that don't really sound like football players. It will be so awesome if I win and beat out the people who are super serious about football. I am very competitive so I will try my best. The downside to all this extra extroverted energy is the inevitable "How's the job search going?" question. I dread this question and cringe on the inside whenever I hear it. I know people mean well, and I know I would ask the same exact thing to someone in my situation, but the question sucks. I hear myself saying the same thing over and over again "Frustrating, but..." then I try to spin it in a positive light. What else can I say? I don't want to sit there sulking and say that it's an emotional roller coaster, and some days (well most days) you don't even want to get out of bed, and everything feels like a rejection even if you didn't really want the job, and you get so emotional you cry when someone doesn't want to hire you even though you aren't normally much of a crier, and it wears on you, and your self esteem, and you have to pray every night to keep in touch with your faith and keep your inner strength going as strong as humanly possible. Damn, that's the truth, and it felt good to say it.