The above saying is what I used to say about myself that I still feel is relevant today. I am, in fact, an egomaniac with an inferiority complex. Perfect example. I recently went to two interviews with the same company. After the first interview I liked most things about it, but wasn't sure if the position was right for me. During the second interview it was revealed I'd be working in a different office location than I initially expected- and I did not like that. Plus I was still questioning the job. I had the feeling I wouldn't be getting an offer, and I felt in my gut that it wasn't the right position for me.
Today I received my official (and sterile) rejection email. Since seeing that email my ego has felt bruised- why didn't they want ME? Even if I really didn't want them, they should have wanted me. My mind starts to spin, wondering what they said about me in post-interview conversation and why they ultimately chose someone else. For the second interview they had me go through the process of delivering a presentation- which I went to the Library and paid to have color handouts printed for- so now I find myself bitter and resentful toward the sterile email they sent in response. Gee, thanks for the appreciation! Again, the constant need for approval and recognition from others is so strong- my ego craves it. My ego runs my mind like a wild beast, keeping me miserable.
I need to learn how to let go of my ego's desires to achieve true peace and happiness.
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