For years I've maintained a perfect facade. I was an actress skilled enough that I should have won a few academy awards. This past winter I was deeply inspired by "Shadows in the Sun" a memoir on depression. The author's truth made me realize I needed to start by being honest, with myself and with others. This is the first step and I am blogging it along the way in hopes to help anyone who may be struggling with something similar, or at least give hope that you're not alone.
Wednesday, September 10, 2014
Continuing the Fight
It's been a while since my last visit so here's the updates: After immense searching, I was able to find a great Therapist who accepts insurance (miracle)! So I'm now seeing her on a weekly basis. I also see a Psychiatrist (who doesn't take insurance, of course) once a month. About 11 days ago I switched from Lexapro to Cymbalta, right now I'm at 30mg. The first night on Cymbalta was rough and I barely slept, but things have gotten more manageable since then. My stomach is still not great, but it started misbehaving even before I made the med switch. I'm still fatigued, but I'm also anxious pretty much 24/7 which I'm sure drains a lot of my energy. I just purchased a Groupon deal for Acupuncture so I'm going to switch and try them out- I feel bad for 'ditching' my current Acupuncturist but she costs $100/session and this deal gets me 5 sessions for $100, so I really couldn't afford to pass it up. During the first week of September I taught my first training class for a nearby college and that was extremely exciting. I felt like I was doing what I'm supposed to be doing, which I never feel when I'm at my full time job. I'm supposed to travel for work soon, from September 22-25. Extremely nervous and not sure that I can handle it. I haven't traveled alone in years and it's really making me panic. I hope I can somehow find the inner strength to do it because I know it would be such an amazing accomplishment for me. I'm going to keep fighting and will keep you updated on my journey as I hope to help someone with anxiety and/or depression who might be feeling the same way. You're not alone.
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